Hanging out with some of you young bucks, I'm confronted with the effects of declining anabolic hormones; something I've experienced ever since I passed my 45th year. Compounding matters, I've endured a heavy 15-month cortisol cycle brought on by custody battles, real estate mental strife, new business creations, and cross country moving. The damage this has wrought has left me with a mere shadow-- less muscle, more chub-- of what was once a fairly decent physique. Apparently, I'm not alone in this situation as I receive numerous e-mails and posts on my Q&A thread about what I think is the best noncompetitive aesthetic "stack" to bring your body back to its heyday.
Digging through my notes and my memory banks, I've uncovered what I think is the "bomb stack" to effectively enhance my physique for purely narcissistic, shallow, self centered and selfish reasons. Unfortunately, I designed and perfected this protocol when I lived in Mexico where drugs are legal (and cheap). Given the fact that I'm just fine with such a justification to use drugs, and the fact that they were legal where I was, this little protocol was just the ticket to restore what once was a respectable physique. It was perfect. Given the fact that these drugs are illegal in America (the land of the free), I'm going to disclose this incredibly safe and effective protocol for purely informative and entertainment purposes. This being the internet, some of you in more sane countries could take advantage of this amazing therapy, while the rest of you have to just dream. Some of you are going go ahead and break the law anyway-- although I'm strongly advising you NOT to-- so you might as well know what you're doing. I also thought that sharing my little cycle would make a great present for all my loyal readers-- a tried and true stack that is safe, effective, non-toxic, and comes with a minimum of-- if any-- side effects. So, let's talk about my Bring Your Body Back Stack.
In designing this stack, I wanted no visible side effects, (i.e. no acne, no oily skin, and no undo aggression). I also wanted to be kind to my liver and my kidneys. This protocol is not designed to turn you into Rico Mac Taco; it just makes you look good.... really good.
This desire, incidentally, is not unheard of. According to Penn State's world renown expert on steroids, Dr. Charles Yesalis, over 1/3 of the 15 million people estimated to have used steroids in this country have done so for purely aesthetic reasons. The non-competitive, look good, type stacks are usually the more sane approach to using performance enhancing drugs. Small amounts for relatively short periods of time is actually quite beneficial and extremely safe, especially for guys over 35, when natural anabolic hormone levels begin to decline. A few IUs of GH every other day really kicks things up a notch, as well. This is not to say that diet and training needn't be addressed. However, all combined-- a light stack of low androgen, medium and long range anabolics, GH, certain supplements, a good clean diet, intense training and regular cardio sessions-- add up to some phenomenal results in just a very short time, provided you're not too far gone to begin with.
The underlying steroid array is merely one component of the total commitment the ensuing 14 weeks will require. My thinking is, if I'm going to do this, then I'm going to do it-- cover all bases-- and not decide to do anything counter-productive. I don't believe any one part of this plan is any more important or should be pursued any less aggressively than any other part. Everything is important and it all works very well together.
The steroids I'm using have been singled out because of their desired effect with little or no side effects, no water retention, low liver and kidney toxicity, and synergy when combined. I'll start with everyone's favorite:
NANDROLONE DECANOATE - commonly known as Deca. Deca is hugely popular among thousands of steroid users. It's a low androgenic steroid, with high anabolic properties. It's excellent for developing size and strength, with very little liver toxicity or excessive disturbance to the body's own hormone functions. Deca can be used by almost all athletes bringing about positive results while presenting very few side effects.
Deca has also been known to comfort sore joints that intense training can bring on. Athletes report that sore shoulders, knees and elbows are without pain on Deca. Deca also dramatically improves nitrogen retention and recuperation time between workouts. The drug itself is effective for about two weeks, however, Nandrolone has shown up positive on more steroid tests than any other steroid. This is due to the fact that it stays in the system at a detectable level for up to 18 months. Something to think about if you have a reason to be drug tested. On top of Deca goes:
EQUIPOISE- Working much like Deca, but faster acting, requiring a shot every three days, Equipoise, or Boldenone Undecylenate, is a favorite veterinary steroid of many athletes. Its effects are strongly anabolic, and only moderately androgenic, and it aromatizes at a very low rate. It is also not liver nor kidney toxic. By itself, Equipoise will provide a steady and consistent gain in mass and strength, and, because of its propensity to increase red blood cells, the pump I get on EQ is legendary and lasts for hours after I leave the gym. I find Equipoise works much better stacked with Deca, as the short and long action of either, respectively, complement the other, and the resulting effect of the combination seems greater than the sum of its parts if I were to use either drug by itself - which I have. On top of the Deca and EQ we have:
PRIMOBOLAN - Primobolan depot is a long-acting version of the oral Primo acetate. Injectable Primo is one of the only steroids that works well on a low calorie diet, but is not particularly effective for beefing up as it tends to harden and add muscle tone more than build mass; which is just what I want in this case. While there are certainly other more popular, and more potent steroids, Primo is considered one of the safest and least toxic anabolic steroids available. There also seems to be a synergy when added to the Deca and EQ mix. The three of these drugs combine to increase muscle mass, fill it with blood, and harden it up, while calories are restricted, without poisoning my liver or kidneys, or converting to estrogen nor giving me undesirable side effects such as water retention, acne, or increased aggression. It's the perfect stack for bringing you body back to it's peak.
The ratio is important too. In one week I take 400mg of Deca, 200 mg of Equipoise, and 100 mg of Primo, split into two shots every 3 days. The amount of oil I could be shooting here can be as high as 14 cc every six days, due to the milligram concentration of the drugs. This could be problematic, especially hitting the same spot every time. An oil abscess is always a possibility, especially with certain underground or veterinary brands. And the infection could end up requiring drainage at the hands of skilled medical professionals at great cost. So, keeping the overall volume of oil sterile and to a minimum is obviously important. While I've seen real 200mg/ml Deca for human use, I haven't seen too much of it from Mexico. Mexican Deca for human use is usually limited to 50 mg/ml. There is 200 mg/ml veterinary deca available from Mexico, and one company I've seen is making 300 mg/ml nandrolone. I've also seen 200 mg/ml Boldenone. But 50 mg/ml is the norm south of the border. Underground and European and Asian sources supply all kinds of dosage concentrations, but ultimately your choice is going to be based on what you can get. The Primo, for the most part, is a pharmaceutical item for human use and it comes in little glass vials from Shearing at 50-100 mg/ml.
Accordingly, on the first day I'll load two syringes, each with 200 mg of Deca and 50 mg of Equipoise, and three days later I'll load two more, each containing 50 mg of Equipoise and 50 mg of Primo. Why redundant syringes on a given day? Why not just load one big syringe? Because I site inject.
I've grown to learn, as my butt has grown to substantiate, the fact that shooting steroids into your butt creates a noticeable degree of hypertrophy of the muscle in which it was shot. In other words, having been the designated target for the vast majority of steroids I've injected since 1982, my superior glutes, when flexed, induce a protuberance upon which one could serve tea. While I'm not aware of any studies that show site response to steroid injections, I have found that many of my friends have noticed the same phenomena. Hence, if the injection site accrued any degree of swelling in the target muscle, then why the hell are we wasting the shit on our ass? This, my friends, is the logic behind site injections.
Whether you have the stomach for it or not, the bottom line is still the fact that the injection will be intramuscular (IM), regardless if you poke yourself in the ass or in your delts, calves, biceps and triceps-- or, for that matter, any lagging body part. So, what have you got to lose? True, jabbing a pin into my bicep has had me curl my toes hard enough to nearly rupture a tendon, but tris and delts are a piece of cake; and, in fact, easier to reach than the correct spot on the glutes. The triceps shots are totally painless. Plus, since these muscle groups are-- hopefully-- covered in thinner skin, I can get away with a tiny 23 gauge X 1 inch baby pin. I once bought a box of them in Mexico decorated with little teddy bears and rubber duckies. So, how much could it really hurt?
If steroids are coming in, some aromatization (conversion to estrogen) will occur. This is not particularly problematic at these levels and the simple addition of 20 mg of Nolvadex and 1/2 an Arimidex each night keeps estrogen in check and adds to the "hard" look.
Growth hormone is truly an incredible and amazingly powerful drug. Its effects are profound and quite desirable, and stacked with the drugs mentioned above, bring this endeavor to a whole other level. Much has been written about GH, so I'm not going to get into its mechanics. The stuff works and anyone telling you otherwise doesn't know what the fuck they're talking about.
The only true conjecture over GH is its dosage. Too much GH over a period of time will cause the bones of your hands, upper arm, and brow to grow and thicken giving rise to a condition known as acromegaly. There are also some reports of carpal tunnel syndrome that many people believe is a result of the increased water retention they associate with taking GH. While water retention is not desirable, it can be managed quite easily with a mild diuretic-- Diamox being my favorite at 250 mg/day, three days on and three days off. Interestingly, I've noticed that this water retention is the perfect indicator of proper dosage. In other words, if you're taking enough GH to cause water retention, then you're taking enough GH. For me, water retention starts at 3 IUs every other day. It's quite mild and doesn't usually require a diuretic. 25 to 50 mcg of T3 per day also works pretty well with GH. I take half in the morning and half at night with the Nolvadex and Arimidex.
Almost immediately, results from GH are pronounced. From the healthy glow of my skin, to how vascular I become, to how good it makes me feel, to how round my muscle bellies look, to how rapidly I get lean, the addition of GH to this stack is like adding a nitrous bottle to a dragster. Steroids and GH definitely go together-- just ask any Olympian.
While I believe small amounts of GH can be taken forever, the other shit has to go, eventually. The smartest way to do that is with a taper-down that attenuates the drugs down to nothing over about four weeks. I'd probably start this process after the 14th week and start PCT at 2000 IUs of HCG every 3rd day for the first 15 days, then add in 50 mg 2x per day of Clomid just to remind my balls that they're not out of work entirely.
Dieting is a dirty word, especially around the holidays. But, I'm not out to win a contest, so a cheat here and there-- especially over Thanksgiving-- is perfectly acceptable. The far majority of the time though, I eat a meal every three hours containing 50 to 70 grams of a complete protein. Since I do much better on a low-carb diet, I only take in 40 grams a day of waxy maize (Carbolyze) in my post-training protein (Isolyze) shake. I also make sure I take in good fats at each meal, usually 2 TBS of peanut butter, olive oil, or Macadamia nut oil, with each meal on top of whatever leafy veggies I want; usually a salad or broccoli. It can get pretty boring, but I have plenty of energy to train and do cardio, especially if I split my training and cardio up into separate sessions. It's not that hard to stick to considering I reward myself generously every two weeks or so with whatever I want, in copious amounts.
Supplements are an area of personal preference. Using such a stack really doesn't require all kinds of muscle-building supplements and prohormones. I do love some of the Nitric Oxide and creatine supplements out there for that pre-training load that adds to the pump. Other than that-- some kind of stimulant/fat burner, and the protein/carb drink immediately after my work out-- I don't rely too heavily on supplements when I'm on gear. I do take a multi-vitamin/ mineral supplement with extra antioxidants C, E, and carotenoids, but that's about it. Off-cycle, I load up a lot more.
Training and cardio are pretty personal matters so I'm not going to bore you with my routine. Suffice it to say that the aforementioned stack makes training lots of fun because I can really train hard and heavy. I definitely take advantage of it. Thirty minutes of cardio five times a week sounds like a pain in the ass mainly because it is, but, my metabolism requires it if I want to hang with the big dawgs.
In 30 years of bodybuilding, with all the crazy ideas and dosages and combinations of drugs, the preceding has proven itself time and time again-- it works, and it's safe. You can't ask for more than that.
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