Bodybuilding really isn’t as complicated as everyone wants to make it out to be. Set a goal, learn your body, design a training, nutrition, and drug program, execute, and before long you’ll be at your goal: smothered in pussy. Wait, what’s he talking about? Let’s get real for a minute, even the most hardcore guys out there got into bodybuilding for one thing – to get chicks.
Sure, there might have been some self-image issues or a prior sports background, but nothing drives a man to stay on the grind towards a sick bodybuilding physique like the power of a woman. You think Branch Warren started off training to win Mr. Olympia? Hell no, he wanted to date Trish. But somewhere along our path to bodybuilding awesomeness, we took a wrong turn and became ugly to women. I know it’s hard to believe, but Martin Kjellstrom isn’t scoring with any chicks. Sure he might have knocked them over the head and dragged them back to his cave, but he isn’t slaying any ladies with his physique. Especially not these days with his 3 years sentence to the Swedish boys club.
The whole idea of what motivates a person to compete has always fascinated me. Unlike mainstream sports where athletes are going after college scholarships or riches in the professional leagues, it’s almost a dead end road to think you’ll end up filthy rich as a competitive bodybuilder. Actually, the truth of the matter is that you’ll probably end up losing money pursuing the sport. The cost of healthy food alone is going to run a competitor over $1,000 a month. Add in a 16 week drug schedule of Test, Tren, Masteron, Halo, Hyge’s or Rips, T3, Clen, and Dyazide and you’re looking at another $2,000 bucks even for the well-connected bodybuilder. Oh, and you have to hire a guru for your training and nutrition so we’ll estimate that your George Farrah’s of the world are going to tax you in the neighborhood of $3,000 for a contest prep. Then there are hidden costs like competition fees, tanning, posing trunks, travel expenses, and hotels and you’re looking at $10,000 just to step on stage at a regional show.
I’ve been asked when I’m going to compete dozens of times since I switched my focus from sports training to bodybuilding. When my physique started to look less like a football player and more like a bodybuilder, suddenly people thought I should step up on stage and compete. Being the realist that I am, I always looked at people like they were nuts. I might have some potential and, for all I know, I could hang at a state level show, but I’m a self-aware guy and know that I’ll never be on the Olympia stage. So why torture myself with a brutal contest prep that is going to break the bank? I can stay lean, have some cheat days when I feel like, and live a pretty normal life without wanting to choke slam the guy next to me in traffic because I’m on my 4th day in a row of zero carbs/zero fat. It really doesn’t seem too appealing to me, but for some, they absolutely love it.
What makes me laugh about the typical guy mentality that I, myself have been guilty of is the idea that if I train my ass off and get huge more girls will like me and hopefully want to sleep with me. What a crock of shit that is. Like most huge guys will tell you, girls find them unattractive. Ironically, other guys are more fascinated with huge guys than women will ever be. And let me clarify huge: 5’8’’ 240lb – Huge, 6’4’’ 290lb – Huge; 5’2’’ 225 – Midget, just kidding Jose Raymond, you’re huge too. Sorry fellas out there that are 5’11’’ 220lb, you’re not huge; you’re a bloated men’s physique competitor.
What I’ve gathered after being around the sport and following the athletes and competitive lifestyle is that bodybuilding is a drug. It’s an addiction as powerful as heroin. Are we as men motivated by women? You’re damn right we are. A male lion wouldn’t have a bad ass mane if he wasn’t trying to pick up a little lion hottie. But in this generation of dudes wearing Skinny Jeans and man purses, it just isn’t in fashion to be as thick and nasty as a Marine Corps battle tank. If you want chicks you’ll need to look more like Mark “Flex” Anthony and less like Dennis Wolf. But with all that in mind I think I understand this addiction. I physically get sick and feel weak if I miss time from the gym for more than a few days. I can only imagine how a competitor feels if they aren’t grinding it out on the Step Mill with only 2,000 calories in their system ready to pass out. As sadistic as that sounds it’s what drives a bodybuilder to do what they do. They can’t live without it. They’ll max out their credit cards and empty their checking accounts to finance their addiction. They’ll purposely get so huge and jacked that they become unattractive to the opposite sex. What other sport has diehards like ours? I can’t think of any.
The mindset, the focus, the intensity, and the brotherhood of bodybuilding make it great. No other sport requires the mental toughness of bodybuilding. And no other sport will demand as much from the competitor as bodybuilding. This is what motivates a bodybuilder, and this is why everyone can’t be one.
Until next week, follow me on Twitter @MattMeinrod or read my archived columns on www.MattMeinrod.com
